


Ridiculous

by Nagitoes_Crackmaeda



Category: Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: DiscordEndsHere, HeDeservedWorse, IHateExisting, M/M, MyHeadCanon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-01
Updated: 2020-05-01
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:08:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23942089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nagitoes_Crackmaeda/pseuds/Nagitoes_Crackmaeda
Summary: This is a DUMB thing that I wrote for my DUMB Discord friends, for DUMB reasons.
Relationships: Byakuya Togami/Monokuma
Comments: 3
Kudos: 21





	Ridiculous

It was nighttime. The Monokuma announcement had just played on the monitors, leaving an echo of static to fill the halls. 

Byakuya Togami couldn't sleep; instead, he was pacing just outside of his dorm, his mind running on a 2006 Windows Vista operating system. He knew that if he tried to catch some shut-eye, he would just be laying in bed with nothing but the ceiling titty to keep him company while he fought insomnia.

He wasn't going to do that. 

So, he was wandering around outside of the only safe room in the school for him, looking like a whole suspect in a murder case; that is, if someone happened to die, and someone else happened to see him. 

Of course, everyone else had already turned in for the night, so he _was_ alone. However, that only meant that he was either more likely to be a victim than a suspect, or a pawn for some shitty fanfiction that was devised completely on a whim and written at two o'clock in the morning. 

No one could say for sure. That is, no one except maybe Monokuma, the most overpowered piece of shit in the Danganronpa universe.

That was neither here nor there, though.

An hour had come and gone before Byakuya decided to take his stroll out past the dorm hallway, and into the lobby, near the school entrance. It wasn't like he was returning to his room anytime soon, and while bored, he thought to entertain himself with the idea of what that damn bear might do if he tried to break into the cafeteria. 

Did Byakuya value his life? Yes. Was he a snotty, condescending little shit that would instigate any form of drama just to get his rocks off? Also yes.

He made his way right up to the double doors of the cafeteria entrance. There, he observed his surroundings, wondering from which direction Monokuma might appear. Slowly, but not timidly, he lifted a finger and laid it on the handle. It was just one finger. He didn't expect much. 

Unfortunately, his expectations were set too low. Both doors immediately flew open, knocking Byakuya back onto his ass. The sound of his shoes squeaking against the waxed tile came to a halt only when his body did, several feet away from the doors.

"What in the-!" He began to yell out, but he was interrupted by what he saw standing before him.

What was that? Well, none other than a two-foot tall bear, half-black and half-white, with one funky ass eye. 

"Upoopoopoopoo!" The demonic creature bellowed out. "I've got funky ass eyes _everywhere_ , Togami. How could you, of every student here, be the one who decides to go and break the rules? Do you _want_ to be impaled?" 

Byakuya, still spooked, crawled backwards to make more distance between him and the bear. He was a pissy priss, but also just a little bitch. 

"Don't run! I know exactly what you're here for!" There was an unsettling change of tone in Monokuma's voice. His pitch rose, and he sounded almost...seductive.

Could bears even be seductive? Only an Ultimate Bear Biologist would know. 

"Look," Byakuya began to grovel, "I'll just go back to my dorm. I couldn't sleep, that's all."

"You're not getting away with this so easily, Togami! Come on, let me just enjoy making the big, bad billionaire crumble for a minute." Monokuma started wobbling after his victim. 

"Please, just...stay back!" 

"Look, kid, calm down. You're in a killing game. I'm not the scary one! Your fellow classmates are much more horrifying! I'm just a cute bear!"

Byakuya wasn't really absorbing anything that Monokuma was saying. He held one hand up as he pushed himself back more, waving it as if to shoo the bear away.

"How about we make a deal?" Monokuma proposed, pausing in his tracks. "We hurry up and get to the juicy parts? For the sake of all that is unholy about this fandom, it is 4 o'clock in the morning, and this garbage isn't complete, yet!"

"Ehh..." 

"What do you say? I can be a plushie fleshlight for just for this one-shot, you can get your billion-dollar dick beat, and we can all forget this ever happened?" 

Once again, Byakuya wasn't really comprehending. Not because he was stupid, but because he was just plain stupid.

"Deal!" Monokuma screeched. He bounced over to Byakuya and landed right on his groin. It was a damn good thing that he was just a plushie for this trash fanfiction, because if he had his canonical mechanical bits, that would have hurt the Ultimate Acidic Probiotic.

Byakuya yelped, but only in shock. Not pain. 

Monokuma started grinding against him, making "beastiality" a suitable tag for this piece. 

"Get _off!"_ Raising a hand, Byakuya prepared to strike. He didn't usually resort to violence, just crying, but he had to do something.

"Ah, ah, ah! Don't forget the rules, Togami!" 

"Damnit!" The Ultimate Applesauce Prototype seethed. 

The despair bear jumped back onto his feet, then tore off the quivering student's pants in one, comic go. He turned around, still straddling Byakuya's lower regions, and spread his plush cheeks to expose...a hole. 

Stuffing dripped from the hole onto Byakuya's dick. As unsightly as this all was to him, he sort of wanted to know in that moment _why_ Monokuma had a gaping hole in his ass. It was clear he wasn't the first student to become a plaything for this plaything. 

Monokuma wasted no time in falling back onto the Ultimate Anime Popcorn's shaft, and though he lacked his mechanical skeleton, he somehow bounced up and down on that dick like he had years of experience. 

The bear huffed, which was a ghastly sound. "Are you feeling despair now, Mr. Togami? Feelin' it now, Mr. Togami?" 

"If you're wanting me to cum, I won't do it! B-baka!" Byakuya crossed his arms, which meant that he lost all support under his body. He wobbled a bit, then his upper body fell flat against the ground. The Ultimate Anal Panda scoffed at his own idiocy. "Fine..." 

Sighing, Byakuya allowed his body to relax enough for him to enter the state of...Byakuya's Fantasy. Yes, the imaginative world in which he and his homoerotic lover, Hifumi Yamada, would engage in kinky roleplay. 

He closed his eyes and tried to imagine his crush being the one who was playing hopscotch on his dick, right now. Hifumi's thick cheeks slapping against his lower abdomen wasn't something that he had any trouble conjuring up in his mind. 

It was super easy from there for the Ultimate Acting Pinecone to fill Monokuma with his despair juice. 

It _was_ five o'clock in the morning, now, and the whole concept behind this fanfiction was now lost in a general chat log. The joke was no longer funny. 


End file.
